Growing Up

We all get that same feeling during a mile stone of our life, "Oh man, I feel like I am getting so old." I've gone through some big mile stones and after each one I expect that feeling to go away. I always thought I'd eventually grow up and wouldn't have that "Oh, I'm getting so old," feeling anymore. But I suppose if we're getting older every second, every minute, every hour and every day then that feeling will never go away.

Babies learn to crawl, to use their teeth, to pick things up, walk and talk; they just keep growing up and getting older. Then they're a kid. Remember your first day of Kindergarten, "Golly, I'm a big kid now!"
But then just wait till your first day of first grade. Next thing you know; you're riding a bike without training wheels, walking home from school by yourself, and riding in the front seat of the car.

I still remember the first day of my Freshman year of High School, goodness did I think I was SO old! Then Junior year, upper class man status=ollldddd!

It's so surreal, the growing up thing. It's like it never really happens, as if we are continually growing up our whole lives.

Then you get your drivers licenses. I remember that too, I thought I was all grown up and sooo cool.

Tonight I am back at that same feeling, "Oh man, I feel like I am getting so old," because in 15 days I am moving away from home. I am moving out of parent's house. I am moving to a whole other state with no family. I will be living in an apartment and paying bills a month from now.

Where does the time go? You know what I remember? I remember not being strong enough to pour myself a glass of milk when the jug was full. I remember not being able to brush my own hair. I remember being 5 years old sitting in the back seat of my dad's red 4 runner singing along to Avril Lavigne's first CD. We were driving through Buena Vista, CO--some little small mountain town we stayed in to go skiing at Copper Mountain every winter. My brother was in the seat next me; probably annoyed because he didn't care for Avril. And both my parents were up front--like together in the same car, not divorced. I remember when they got divorced and I thought I was growing up because I realized life was hard.

Right now I am growing up too though. So did I not get older all those other times? Did all those times I thought I was growing up mean nothing? No, because growing up isn't something that happens all at once. It's something that takes place your whole entire life. It's your experiences--good or bad--that shape you into your identity. We never stop growing up.

I swear I'll see my first grand kid between 50 and 60 [years old] and think, "Oh man, I feel like I am getting so old," but I won't be. I'll just be growing up; becoming wiser, stronger, well-rounded, and experienced because that grand kid is going to teach me what I've never experienced before. As long as we are experiencing something new, we are still growing up.