I'm proud of you. It's hard to make decisions about where to live. It's hard to choose between two groups of people and two completely different places. You were brave to come out here and you're brave to go back. I can't imagine. It's hard, it's so hard to pick something. I'm realizing how brave you are because I think I'm moving back to my family in Colorado too. Not now, but in June after my internship. It's hard though. I'm scared to death. I'm scared of losing everything I've gained here. I'm 100% a different person than when I moved here. Literally 100% different. I can't imagine going back to a place that was so spiritually suffocating. But I know if God wants me there for real, it won't be spiritual suffocating.
I came to Austin for a church, you came for a job. And I can't imagine how hard that would be to come here without knowing you had a church family here. My whole family is in Colorado, but it's hard to imagine going back without knowing there's a church family there for me. But as I type this I'm convicted bc I know there is one. God will provide if that's where he really wants me *sigh* so that has to settle me and steady me.
I'm scared of becoming who I used to be again. "Who I am hates who I've been". Ha. Classic Relient K line :)
But really, that's what I'm scared of! Uh, convicted again. I have to trust God's work in me. I have to trust. I have to. Or else I'll never follow God in life, I have to have faith and I have to trust.
So this is it. I think God is calling me back to Austin. And so I'm realizing you're brave Melanie. Because this is hard, really hard. Wish me luck.
No comments:
Post a Comment